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Monday, May 22nd, 2006
1:58 pm - The Sweeter and the Sweetest
The Sweeter and the Sweetest

This won't be one of the more normal fics you've read. I decided to pick two people I thought were the sweetest of sweet and put them together, with a dash of magic and just a pinch of love. (Ok, make that a whole bucket full of love) The setting: The famous chocolate factory of Willy Wonka. The characters: Willy Wonka of course! And introducing...Michael Jackson. (I told you this was going to be strange) For those of you who are grossed about about guy/guy fluff, or MJ, I wouldn't suggest reading this. Also, this is the NEW Charlie and the Chocolate Factory setting, not the old one with Gene Wilder, so this is the Johnny Depp Wonka. (Yum yum!)

*Note: I don't own, nor know, either of the characters in the story, so don't ask*

It was a cold, snowy day in London and Michael Jackson was bored. He was tired of sitting in his hotel room, staring at the art on the walls and listening to the scream of his fans. Oh, make no mistake: Michael LOVED his fans, they made him who he was; yet he longed for the chance to walk the streets without being mobbed. He sighed and looked towards the door; it was, as usual, guarded by two of his bulky security guards, keeping him in the hotel room like a caged animal. Another sigh. Suddenly, one of the guards nudged the other and they opened the door to leave. "Don't worry Mr. Jackson, you aren't in any danger. Just a few crazed fans are trying to get up on our level," the first one said to the superstar. Michael nodded, folding his hands in his lap and sighing once again. Just then, an idea came into his head: He wasn't being watched, this was his chance! All he had to do was pick the perfect disguise, and he'd be free as a bird! Michael slowly moved across the room to his elegant closet and pulled out a cloak with a hood. After putting it on, along with a black mask over his face, Michael stepped in front of the mirror; Perfect! Opening the door and making sure no one was watching, he hurried down the hall way, down the spiraled staircase, and right out the front door without so much as a passing glance.
It took everything he had in him from not singing at the top of his voice from pure happiness; at last, he was free! Michael wandered the streets, window shopping at his own speed and going wherever he wanted without a care in the world...at least until the sun began to set. After awhile the night air grew cold, and his freedom escapade grew somewhat less-than-fun. Then it hit him; he had no idea where he was, and it's not like he could just ask anyone, he'd be spotted in two seconds and he didn't have anyone to protect him! Michael back stepped a few feet and started walking down an alleyway, hoping he'd end up on a main street and could spot his lavish hotel, it's name forgotten to him at the moment. Just then he heard footsteps, and it sounded like more than one person was around. Michael spun around in a few different directions, and to his horror four scruffy looking men were closing in on him at all angles. "Well welly welly well, look'it what we got 'ere boys!" one of the men said in a thick British accent. "Aye, she's a real beaut ain'tshe? I say we have a little go at this filly." Michael froze; they thought he was a woman, since all they could see he was his feminine eyes and thin figure.
Time seemed to slow down as all four of the men went at Michael, armed to tear his gentle body apart and defile him to the highest point. Michael shut his eyes and put his hands over his face, sinking to his knees and praying they'd leave him alone. Just then, one of the men started screaming like an animal and slid face-first across the alley and into the gutter. Michael opened his eyes, only to see a hoity-toity shadowed figure beating the hell out of the men with his cane! "Oy, what'n the HELL is this stupid bastard doing? Get'm boys!" the leader of the pack yelled. The remaining two charged the darkened man, who leapt upon a garbage can and nailed both across the face with the silver ball atop his cane. Bright red blood splattered the alleyway floor, and the men took off with their hands over their mouths, the leader close in toe. Michael's eyes widened at the man who began walking towards him, his oddly high-heeled boots clicking across the cobblestone. He didn't get too good a look at his hero, as his mind grew foggy and he fell unconscious into the man's arms.
Michael soon felt warmth surrounding his body, so he opened his eyes and was greeted with quite a site; the most elegant bedroom he'd ever seen. Strange art hung on the walls, the floor was marble like that of a ballroom, and a chandelier hung from the ceiling. Everything was red velvet, from the curtains to the bed he was sitting on. Oh, and the bed! Long enough for a snake to sleep at it's backbone's full length, it sunk into the golden frame. The bed set was all blood-red velvet, and elegant curtains hung around it, currently pulled back to the base. Michael gently ran his hands over the rose petal pattern of the sheets. "How...beautiful..."he said in a breathless voice. "Yah, I know. Aren't they WEIRD?" a very chipper voice said behind his back. Michael spun around to finally see the one who'd saved him, and gazed at him from the feet up. The man was wearing high-heeled black boots, pinstripe black velvet pants with a matching vest, a blood red silk blouse, a long coat-tailed jacket with candy buttons, and a silver 'W' crest lay at his throat. Michael's eyes traveled to the man's pale face and gentle ruby lips, and sparkling near-amythest eyes. Atop his shoulder length, silky brown and quite straight hair was a black top hat, making him seem even more hoity-toity than first glance.
"Oh good, I thought you might've been dead there for a second, HA!" the strange man quipped, the sugar-sweet smile that revealed perfect white teeth never leaving his ivory face. Michael removed the mask from the bottom part of his face and pushed his hood back." Um...who-who are you?" he said softly, still a tad shaken up. The man, who'd been staring of into space, turned his head towards Michael. "Who me? Why, I'm the amazing chocolatier, the candy genius, and the owner of the amazing factory!" the man replied, sliding forward on his heels and extending a gloved hand to Michael. "I'm Willie Wonka, and who might YOU be?" Michael gently shook his hand, smiling at the man's eccentric way of speech. "Michael...Jackson. I'm sure you already knew that though." he replied. "Knew that? Nope, sure didn't, never heard of you before in my life, nope nope." Wonka said. Michael was baffled; EVERYONE knew who he was! Yet, it seemed like this man was a bit of a recluse, so he decided not to press the manner.
Michael gently crossed one leg over the other, and his face turned into that of total disgust. "Oh-oh dear! I'm all wet, I must've kneeled right in the snow!" he stuttered. Then it dawned on him; he hadn't thanked this man, who'd just saved his life despite the fact of having NO idea who he was. "I want to thank you...for saving my life." Michael said meekly, toying with a crease in the bed sheets. Wonka just waved a gloved hand in his direction. "Now now, no need for that. I don't want you getting a cold in those wet clothes, so let's get you outta them. We mustn't dilly or dally!" he said cheerfully, taking ahold of Michael's hand and pulling him into his step-in closet.
"Well I'll be gosh darned left for words, you look awfully spiffy in my clothes, HA!" Wonka quipped in his sugary voice. Michael stepped in front of the full length mirror, and when he got a glimpse of himself he gave a little gasp. His outfit was nearly identical to that of Wonka's, but everything that was red on him was white on himself. The buttons were little candy canes and the brim around the top hat was white and sparkly. Michael turned on one of the rather stilletto heels and ended up face to face with his saviour, whom for some reason had been awfully close before he'd turned. For the first time since he could remember, a strange warmth ran through Michael's body as it rose into his normally pale face, covering it with a rosy blush. A few moments went by before Wonka broke the locked gaze with Michael's eyes and took ahold of his arm. "Come now, let's get a move-on, we have alot to see before the sun goes down!" he said in a cheery voice, pulling him towards the door. "Alot to...see? What do you mean, where are we going?" Michael asked with a questioning look on his face. "Why, I'm taking you on a personal tour of my factory, of course! Might as well since you're here, and I haven't had visitors in ages, yah know?" Wonka replied, with his sweet toned voice almost dancing around the two of them. Michael's face lit up; he'd heard alot about the chocolatier's famous factory of sweet things, and he'd always had a secret wonder about if his own magical home could someday be similar.
The day went by as fast as fast can go, Michael felt. Wonka showed him everything in the factory, from Fudge Mountain to the Inventing Room, to the famous Chocolate Room which he felt he NEVER wanted to leave. Soon they arrived in front of a double-doored room with glittery hearts all over the door. Wonka pulled out his ring of keys and pulled out one that, of course, had a heart at the handle. Before putting it in the keyhole, he paused for a moment, a strange look washing over his normally plastic-looking face. "Which room is this one?" Michael asked with a smile. Wonka gave a nervous cough and unlocked the room. "Well yah see, after awhile I learned that not only children liked my candy, but adults as well. So lately I've been working on special treats for grown-ups, yah know?" he replied and opened the door.
Well, if Michael felt embarrassed before about being face-to-face with this man, that feeling was smashed to nothing as he gazed at the things in the room. It was all...well, QUITE adult; it was all oils and body paint and what not, in all of Wonka's odd flavors he'd invented. Michael sat down in one of the chairs and stared at his lap, trying to hide the blush that was rapidly covering his ivory features. Wonka strolled past him as if nothing was wrong, and walked up to a machine which looked like it had about a hundred, super-long curly straws sticking out of it. Taking ahold of one of the odd straws, he pointed it straight down and a blood-red liquid poured out into the goblet in his hand; within seconds, it was filled and he handed it to Michael. "What is this?" Michael asked, sniffing it gently. Wonka sat down with a goblet himself and gently ran one of his gloved fingers along the brim of the cup. "Well yah see, this is one of my latest and greatest inventions! I discovered a way to mix berries and chocolate into such a fine mix that you could drink it like water or wine!" Michael smiled shyly at his happiness, and raised his goblet. "To your brilliance!" he said cheerfully. Wonka's face turned to that of shock, but only for a second before his normal sugary-sweetness was plastered back on as he clinked his goblet against his guest's. It would seem, however, that the brilliant inventor had made one mistake in not fully checking what kind of berries he'd used in his mixture, as they had a slight alcohol content...in small doses, that is.
An hour or so went by, and soon the two were red-faced and laughing hysterically at nothing in particular. It would seem the two shared another thing in common, and that was their alcohol tolerance which appeared to be rather weak. Michael placed his goblet on the table and smiled in a rather silly manner, the potent stuff running rapidly through his system with quite a enjoyable, warm feeling; he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so carefree and happy. "Well than, shall we get some rest? It's been a pretty eventful day, wouldn't you say? HA!" he laughed, extending a slightly shaky hand to Michael. Accepting his hand, he stood up, his legs right away giving out and dropping his right into Wonka's arms. Michael straightened out his back and hips, finding himself nose-to-nose with the chocolatier. Both locked eyes on the curious creature in front of them, and blushed equally as red. "...forgive me..." Michael said breathlessly, captured by the beauty of the other man's eyes and flawless features. Wonka made a slight choking sound with his throat and released him, and the two weaved back towards the elegant bedroom in silence.
Michael sat down on the edge of the bed an gently toyed with one of the candy cane buttons on his lavish costume; what had happened just now? He'd never felt like that in anyone's presence before, but now...giving a very confused sigh, he dropped his swimming head into his gloved hands. Wonka himself was dealing similar emotional plight; he'd been alone his entire life, not once feeling even a sugary drop of affection towards another, yet now...he let himself sink against the pillows at the other end of the bed and tipped his top hat over his eyes. Worried he'd offended him, Michael crawled over and gently moved the brim up with his hands. "Have I...offended you in someway? If I have I'm...I'm really sorry and I didn't mean to, I'm just...dealing with emotional problems and I'm...well..I just..."Michael wasn't sure if it was love, sadness, alcohol or a mix of all three that caused his next action, but...he burst into tears and backed away from Wonka, crying like a child into his hands.
Needles to say, Wonka was shocked. Not exactly sure what to do, as an example of his inexperience, he scooted to Michael's side and gingerly placed his gloved hands on Michael's shaking shoulders. "Hey now, d-don't cry! You don't need to cry, everything's alright yah know?" Michael turned around and wrapped his arms around Wonka's neck and buried his head into his shoulder, sniffling softly."I'm s-sorry, I'm such a child, crying l-like this! But I can't help it, I don't know w-what's going on, I'm s-so confused!" he cried. Wonka gently placed his arms around Michael's body, pulling him into a tight embrace and feeling a tidal wave of mixed feelings crash over him as he did. "It's alright to be confused, yah know? I'm confused all the time!" he said, laughing nervously. Michael's tears stopped and he broke the embrace, looking right into Wonka's eyes. A smile suddenly danced across his lips, from ear to ear, and he started giggling like a child. Soon it turned into hysterical laughter, which for some reason appeared to be unknowingly infectious as Wonka began to laugh as well, his top hat falling lop-sided.
After a few moments their echoing laughter subsided and they came to the realization they were, once again, in quite a close embrace. Wonka bit his lip and looked down, and Michael blushed softly and turned away. The two made an akward attempt at unhooking their arms, without any success. Wonka tipped his head upward and looked Michael right in the eyes; the reminded him of...chocolate. He then took ahold of Michael's slender chin and pressed his lips to his, tightly. Michael's breath caught in his throat and his eyes widened as far as they could as he broke away from the chocolatier. "I'm...I'm so sorry! That was...I...I don't know what I did that for, but it was wrong! Please forgive me!" Wonka stuttered. Michael placed a finger to his lips, shushing him. "Please don't stop." was all he said as he leaned foward and kissed him back. It was perfect much better than the first kiss. It was like a dam had broken and the two released the pent-up passion they'd had inside forever, but hadn't find the right person to express it to.
Wonka gently intertwined his arms with Michael's body and lay back against the pillows, taking him down with him. The two roamed over eachother's bodies, getting to know every inch, sharing soft kisses here and there. Michael gently buried his head into Wonka's neck, nuzzling him gently. "What comes next?" Wonka asked, assuming his partner knew the table of contents when it came to love. Michael's cheeks flushed, knowing EXACTLY what came next but not sure if it was the right thing to do. His gaze met that of Wonka, who's quizzical expression turned to that of embarrassed understanding. "I...I see. But...I don't know how that, yah know, works..." he said nervously. Michael gently pressed his forehead against Wonka's cheek. "Neither do I, and that's why I trust it."
Sunlight crept through the stained glass windows of the elegant bedroom the next morning, revealing pieces of the hoity-toity clothing laying everywhere next to Wonka's bed, which had the curtains drawn around it. Michael lay cuddled in his partner's arms, who was gently stroking his hair. A part of him wanted to stay there with him in the factory forever, but a guilty expression loomed over him: His people, who were probably already in a panic, were looking for him, and he couldn't exactly just vanish off the face of the earth! He was too famous for that, and he had to go back. A tear slid down his cheek and splashed onto Wonka's shoulder. "What's wrong?" he asked softly. "I can't stay here...I have to go back, they're looking for me..."he replied, tears filling his chocolate brown eyes. Wonka gently tipped his head up and gave him a gentle kiss. "I understand. Go, go." he nodded. Michael stood up and dressed himself in Wonka's borrowed clothes, not really giving a damn what his people would think about it.
As he walked down the long corridor towards the front gates, he felt his lover's hand on his shoulders. "I don't know how and I don't know when, but...somehow you've inspired me to invent something new for the public, something after your own heart and love. I promise to dedicate it to you, since I'm sure I'll never see you again." he said, his eyes filling with tears. Michael moved forward and wrapped his arms around Wonka's neck and gave him one last kiss; no thank you was necessary, his love said it itself. As he hurried outside and through the front gates, the chocolatier swore he'd never love again, for his sweetness would forever belong to one who'd outdone him when it came to inspiration.
Months passed and Michael's team was beyond worried about the pop star. Ever since he'd disappeared that one night in England he'd been acting differently. He didn't sing nor dance, and refused to speak to anyone. However, that all changed one day as a package arrived at the gates of Neverland, wrapped in paper that was covered in candy canes. The security guard that received the box went up to Michael's room and knocked on the door. "Mr. Jackson?" "I told you, I don't want to be disturbed," came the heartbroken reply at the other end of the door. "I-I know sir, but...something came for you today. I'll just leave it here," said the guard, leaving the box at Michael's door. As soon as Michael heard him walk away, he opened the door and brought the box inside and set it on his bed; there was no name on it, but it smelled oddly like...chocolate. Michael tore of the wrapping and opened the box, only to find an antique-style pink perfume bottle filled with sparkly liquid. Quizzically, he sprayed it it on himself and the moment it reached his nose he knew exactly who it came from. Later that day, one of Michael's guards asked him what that scent he was wearing was. Smiling, Michael replied, "It's a special perfume made only for me. It's called...Sweeter and Sweetest."

~El Fin~ (That means The End, you silly snozzwhangers)

current mood: Moo!

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Thursday, March 9th, 2006
3:29 pm - Do you know how it feels?
Do you know how to feels to have a drunken parent slam you against a door and feel the doorknob hit your spine so hard you feel like it snapped in half? To have them scream in your face how useless and worthless you are, how they wish no one would ever find your body, and when you open your mouth to protest they slap you so hard you bleed?

Do you know how it feels to retreat to your room in fear, huddled on the floor, crying in shame as you slam your head against every hard surface near by, praying your skull or neck will snap and you will be away from the pain?

Do you know how it feels to wake up in the morning, alone thank god, and when you take your clothes off to take a bath you see more bruises than pale skin?

Do you know how it feels to have the last thing that same parent say to you before running out the door to go drink with her stupid friends be, "I hate you"?

current mood: sad

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Sunday, March 5th, 2006
12:11 am - A cold rain is falling in my head.
I've been feeling like a dreary and cold rain has been falling inside of my head for sometime now, and that is the only way I can explain it. It literally feels like a wet, freezing...thing swirling around my brain. It doesn't hurt all of the time, just some, but it mainly makes my body numb and my heart as well. Sometimes I wonder if I'm dying, but I know it's not that; I have no reason to be dying! But...why do I feel like I did before, in my days of blood and depression and meds and doctors? I don't want to go down that path again, yet I might since the one I'm walking on now is collecting quite a bit of fog. Only time will tell what will happen to me, so all I can do is wait.

current mood: gloomy

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Friday, February 24th, 2006
9:39 pm - I got fired, LOL :D
Yeah, my slant-eyed boss fired me because it 'was not working out'. Oh well, fuck'er. :D

current mood: bitchy

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Friday, February 17th, 2006
7:11 pm - Well, now so that's what kinda lover I am n.n
The Liberated Lover
72% partner focus, 57% aggressiveness, 65% adventurousness
Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that:

You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own.

This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover.

The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market."

In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed.

Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover.


current mood: bouncy

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Tuesday, February 14th, 2006
9:28 pm - I give this holiday one FINGER up! :D
I've been in my room since about 5:30 am, and I just came out now at 3pm. Why? Because I'm being an emo kid and this holiday makes me grumpy. When you are a little kid Valentines Day means putting together a bunch of Scooby Doo valentines and bringing them to school to put in everyone's little boxes, and eating candy and cookies all day. When you become an adult, it pretty much shoves in your face what a lonley and unwanted person you are. Or maybe that's just me.

current mood: Die, Valentines Day

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Monday, February 13th, 2006
2:49 pm - *sigh* Is it the pain from inside that hurts me this way?
I am in such an emo mood right now.
Is it because I started my Girly Time?
Is it because flippin' VALENTINES BUTT-DAY is tomorrow?
Is it because I seem to be the only one without someone?
Psh. I'm going to go stuff Hershey Kisses in my mouth and be emo.

current mood: Emo

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Friday, February 10th, 2006
5:25 pm - Will you sing at my funeral?
Last night I had a dream that words cannot describe.

I was walking down a long, white hallway, yet I knew not why I was there. I was nurses and doctors, and I entered a room filled with flowers and cards. It reminded me of a gift shop. When my eyes fell upon the person on the bed, there lay Tony, one of my best friends. He was dying; he was dying and there was nothing I could do about it. I was so shocked and sad that I couldn't even cry. I knelt down by his hospital bed and took his hand, stroking it with my fingers. He opened his pretty brown eyes slightly, and his face lit up when he saw me. "Nikki?...is...is that you?" He asked, pain lancing through every word. I nodded, gently kissing his hand. "I'm here now Tony, I'm here." He smiled a little bit, showing that cute gap-toothed grin of his. "Glad you're here sweetie, I had something I wanted to ask you..." "Anything you want, anything." I replied. "You know that song, the one the girl sang when I was in school?...the one that touched my heart?" I nodded, knowing exactly what song he ment. "Would you...", he squeezed my hand, "...sing it at my funeral?" My eyes filled with tears, and I gave his hand a little smack." Don't you say silly things like that! You'll be fine, God wouldn't take you from us, not now...not now!"

Then...everything went white.

When the picture returned, I was standing in a beautiful church, dressed all in black and I was positioned at the mic. I was standing in front of a sea of crying people, and the moment I saw a few dressed as MJ impersonators I knew that my darling had died. I cleared my throat and said in a shaky voice, "You did so much for me, Tony; now it is my turn to grant your last wish." I took a deep breath, and looked towards the heavens and began to sing. "You're in the arms of the angels...fly away, from here. You're in the arms of the angels...may you find some comfort here....Oh Tony, you have beautiful angel wings now; god bless you." I whispered at the end of my painful song.

Then I woke up, and I had tears pouring down my face.

current mood: *sniff*

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Tuesday, January 31st, 2006
6:59 pm - Dude, I got tatooed :D
...wow, that rhymed.
Anyway! I've wanted a tatoo ever since I was about 10 years old, and today at 1 pm I finally got what I wanted. It took 20 minutes and $50 bucks and just a wee bit of pain (Feels like a constant cat scratch, it's more annoying then painful), but it was over before I knew it and now I have in beautiful letters, a name; behind that name is one of the most important people in my life, someone who helped me find faith within my self and in Jesus Christ. He is forever in my heart, and now forever on my shoulder blade. n.n

current mood: I'M SO HAPPY!

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Tuesday, January 24th, 2006
1:01 pm - ...I am going to go nuts if I have another one of these weirdo dreams.
I have been having the most messed up dreams lately, and they've all been causing me to wake up either crying or panting. My most recent one caused me to sit up straight in bed and go WTF?!

(Please note that this dream is MESSED UP and it's not like I want any of this to happen, so don't label me as a sicko or anything; I don't control what I dream!)

I was in someone's bedroom, and it was very clean and neat and nice. There were posters of Shawn Michaels and western gunslingers and what not on the walls, and a few little pictures of Michael Jackson. But of course, I was in Tony Redburn's room. He walked in and sat on the bed next to me, smiling happily at the MJ poster I had brought him as a gift. "This is great! I don't have any posters of Michael in my room and I can't ever find any. Thank you!" I nodded to him, shifting my slightly nosy attention to a drawer near the bed. I opened it and started looking through it until I came across a stack of photos that looked like they may have been a year or two old. In it were a few professional shots of a girl with long brown hair in curls and a wine red dress, standing next to a slightly geeky-but-adorable guy in a lovely suit with sandy brown hair. Tony looked over my shoulder at the pictures, and placed his hands over them. "Ah heh heh, you don't want to look at those," he said in a sort of annoyed tone,"That is my ex-girlfriend, and those are our prom pictures." I smiled and put them back into the box, and looked right into his eyes. "I will never leave you. I will always be your friend," I said wholeheartedly. The smile on his face had some sort of effect on me, is the only way I can explain my actions, for I leaned forward in an akward attempt to kiss him. He moved his head backwards trying to escape my caress, and embarrasment and shame washed over me. I bowed my head, "Oh god I am so sorry...I have no idea what came over me, I'm so sorry." He tipped my head up, my eyes meeting the gaze of his deep brown ones. "I suppose if you want to..." he said softly, leaning closer. "No no! I don't want to force--"but I was cut off by his kiss, and I soon found out it was not so forced. It felt heavenly, very sweet and shy yet it was like a dam had broke and all of this hidden passion had been released. I gently wrapped my arms around his neck and ran my fingers through his hair, and he slipped his thin arms around my waist. I pressed myself closer, gently parting his lips with my tongue and giving the cute little gap in his teeth a quick swipe. I suppose that was the move to do it, as we both lay flat against his bed and allowed our souls to touch in ways we'd only dreamed of. Of course, the moment had to be ruined as we heard his mother's foot steps down the hall, and we sat up straight and began a conversation about The Lord. She peeked in, smiled, and walked out. We both looked at eachother with a 'That was damn bloody close' expression on our faces, which quickly faded as we continued our romantic little interlude. The clothes were shed, and soon the inside of his bed looked alot like the back of the old car in the movie Titanic after Rose and Jack were done in there, except with us there was no cheesy hand print on the glass."I wish....there was a way...we could avoid being bothered..."he panted softly, laying his head against my shoulder. "Let my work my powers...just this once," I said with a smile. (This is a dream, and I can do these things only in dreams!) I raised my hand up, and an orb of purple light appeared. "Energy at my command!" I said in a icy tone," Create a shield our eyes can see but another's cannot! HA!" and with that, the orb of light exploded in a huge blast of glitter and created a see-through, purpley shield around his bed; we could see everything, but to anyone else's eyes it would look like just a normal bed with nothing inside. "I...how..."he mouthed slightly. I pressed a finger to his lips,"I will explain later, when it really matters."

And then...I woke up. Like I said before, please don't label me a sicko or anything. I mean, you DON'T CONTROL WHAT YOU DREAM! It just...happens >.>

current mood: I don't feel well...

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Thursday, January 19th, 2006
12:59 am - This is a funny joke :D
So an elephant was walking in the jungle, and steps on a thorn.

He starts cry, he knows there's no way he can get it out himself.

So, an ant noticed the elephant in distress, and says "I'll get the thorn out for you, but you've got to do me a favor"

The elephant says "Sure! What's the favor?"

The ant says "You've got to let me fuck you in the ass."

The elephants thinks about it for a second, and says "ok, just get the thorn out." Thinking that he won't even notice, the ant being so small and such.

So the ant promptly removes the thorn, and crwals up and starts fucking the elephant in the ass.

Nearby, a monkey is seeing this, and gets all horney and excited. So, he starts jumping up and down on a branch... which breaks off and hits the elephant in the head.

The elephant says"OW!"

And the ant screams "TAKE IT BITCH!!!"

current mood: I'M CRAMPY!

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Tuesday, January 17th, 2006
6:25 pm - Now that was a weird dream....
Last night I had a bloody weird dream. I'm guessing my state of mind drove me to think in such ways, so forgive me if this whole thing seems totally nuts.

I was in the back of a white car, with a line of other cars following me. In the car right behind me was two men and Michael Jackson. He waved at me, made some funny faces, and then started throwing bunches of flowers out the window to the fans standing along the pathway we were driving up. After awhile, we drove through the gates of Neverland, and then things went black; when I could see again, everything around me was green grass. I was standing in a circle with Tony Redburn, his friend Justin, E Casanova, Navi and Michael and we were all dressed up as him. Michael called out to us 'HEEHEE!' and one by one, going clockwise in the circle, we answered until Michael suddenly grabbed a hose and sprayed us all. It turned into a wonderful, all-out water fight.
I don't remember anything after that, but the next part I remember very clearly. I was in this room and it was white, and all that was in it was a bed with flowing white sheets. Tony Redburn was in the bed, wearing white, laying in the sheets and sleeping like a helpless kitten. I sat down and in this very slow motion, dreamy sort of way he opened his pretty brown eyes and smiled at me. We began our usual talk about Jesus Christ, the Lord and the Holy Spirit when I suddenly realized how close we were. A strange feeling took me over, and I placed both my hands behind his head and kissed him softly. It was as if our souls gave in; it was so deep, so very sweet and full of love. The look on his face when he broke away was like that of an angel, very shy yet so innocent.

The rest of it I do not remember. Perhaps that is good, perhaps it is not. All I know it I awoke with this feeling of light in my heart.

current mood: drained

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Thursday, January 5th, 2006
10:50 pm - Did three new drawings! :D
I did three new drawings!


Yes, I am aware they are of Tony. But the man is art!

Care to comment?

current mood: busy

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Sunday, January 1st, 2006
1:03 pm - HAPPY NEW YEAR! :D
Happy New Year, one and all! Care to tell us your New Year's resoultions?

current mood: awake

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Wednesday, December 28th, 2005
12:23 pm - This was taken from Helm's Gaia post.
He could put this in better words then I could, so here it is.

"So on Monday, I set off to Moonwalker's house with plans of frolickment at the mall. I pull up to the house to hear "kill you" screamed loudly enough for me to hear from four houses down.

Moderately afraid that someone was going to meet me at the door with a shotgun, I knock and she opens, saying "She knows." I had to give her mom my license >.<

So after that was taken care of, we went to Old Town Sacramento and ended up going to a costume shop. We ended up going to the "naughty" section and bought some fuzzy handcuffs. We also got emo chewing gum. After frolicking there and a magic shop, we decide to go to a record shop, where I bought a Depeche Mode vinyl and watched her dance, which was unbelieveably fucking awesome. We ended up deciding to go to the mall after that. On the way, we saw this blonde hobo go fuckin' berserk and scream at the rentacops from the mall before running into a hotel.

So the next stop is, of course, Victoria's Secret. We browse the random undergarments, taking notes. We kind of wandered around the mall, getting some Pocky and stuff.

After a while, we go outside and sit down together under a bridge, and we're cuddling, talking, and otherwise being cute when I reach into my pocket, pulled out the ring, and asked her to marry me.

She said yes. icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif

After that, we went to my car and listened to music, and I sang some songs to her.

Through this world I’ve stumbled
So many times betrayed
Trying to find an honest word
To find the truth enslaved
Oh you speak to me in riddles and
You speak to me in rhymes
My body aches to breathe your breath
You words keep me alive

And I would be the one
To hold you down
Kiss you so hard
I’ll take your breath away...

and right about then, I kissed her so hard I took her breath away.

After we snogged for a while, we ended up deciding to go to dinner. Not a very good idea, as we got utterly fucking lost on the way. We nearly died when I drove onto the train tracks. We drove through the barrio, laughing at a beatass sign that said "Still the same quality," and after we ended up on a freeway that was nowhere near where we wanted to be, I finally said "Fuck it. Want to go to Reno and spend the night at a hotel room together?"

Indeed, Kirshwasser did.

We found ourselves speeding up the freeway, dizzily, crazily, madly in love with one another as snow began to fall. It was so beautiful...my god, I could feel our souls touching. I could feel my heart beating like it never had before, almost in tears of happiness. The tone of her voice when she calls me Ishu....oh, I wouldn't trade it for the world. We stopped at a gas station, getting some Marlboros. I mean, we both stopped, but jesus, you have to celebrate something that big, you know? You don't run off and get married every day.

And this all came to a stop at a gas station up about fifty miles from the border.

Our parents talked to us, and she ended up fighting with her mom, ending up with her being not allowed to come back home for the night. We drove back, still planning on sleeping together in a hotel, as my parents were altogether accepting.

Of course, we ended up getting horribly fucking lost on the way back, and we went right back to Sacramento because the way I knew to get back was full of black ice. There's not a goddamn chance that I'm going to let anybody or anything hurt my Kirshwasser. We finally ended up stopping at a McD's, getting some nuggets and fries and other cheap McShit. One of her nuggets looked like a chicken penis, so... hence the title.

On the way back, we talked seriously about things. As far as the two of us are concerned, a marriage is a legal binding thing, and we already have the commitment to each other that one is supposed to have when they get married. She's the love of my life.

We ended up calling my parents, and with the help of three maps, a wing and a prayer, we made it to my house for the night, where my parents had thoughtfully set up another bed. We talked with them for a while, getting some advice about love and the marriage.

After they went to bed, we came into my room, turning on the lava lamp, the blacklight, my lights, getting the incense from my shrine lit, and we finally cuddled in each other's arms on my bed, listening to happy trance music. At about 2 AM, I gave her a kiss goodnight, and went to bed in the other bed.

Today, my mom, Kirshwasser, and I drove back to her house, and I was like...ohshi. We ended up getting her flowers, and in general freaked the fuck out, aside from my mom, who kept the situation cool. As it turns out, her mother still likes me, and respects the decision- she just wants us to wait for a while before jumping into things.


The discussion here is pretty clear, I'd have to say. I mean, for the first time, both of us followed our hearts and we were happy together. Carpe fucking Diem, snakes on a motherfuckin' plane."

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Friday, December 23rd, 2005
10:54 pm - God, I'ma bitch not updating and all...
Last time I updated was almost a month ago...anyway, so much to tell!
Well my job is going pretty well, even thought I have to work tomorrow and Sunday (Christmas eve and Christmas day) This year I honestly haven't given a shit about presents, I suppose with age you lose the part of you that really cares about that sort of thing. I didn't even ask for anything, didn't really have a wishlist either. Although I might add that I did get a very special present this year. Let's just say that on April 7th 2006 I am going to be known as Miss Nicoletta Zinser-Watkins. Yes, that's right; I found THE ONE. His name is Helm, and I love him more than I have ever loved anyone, and I have never felt so loved by anyone. I know alot of people reading this are going to bite my head off and call me a stupid child, but he has asked for my hand in marriage and I intend to take it. Anyway, Merry Christmas to all and to all a MIDDLE FINGER :D

current mood: ecstatic

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Friday, December 9th, 2005
11:26 pm - *yawns* What a great first day.
Today was my very first day of work. I landed a job at Awsome Video, and I was there from 6 to 10 today; I will be doing those hours again tomorrow. I honestly have to say I LOVE work, I had a great time! And on top of that, I'm making money! I'm going to pool it all in my account, and use it on stage makeup and costumes so I can start performing more like Tony Redburn. The only negative thing I have to add to this post is that my head is all hurty and it feels like my face is on fire. I believe it's time for me to retire, so ja'!

current mood: tired

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Saturday, December 3rd, 2005
7:40 pm - My stars! Navi?!
Well TODAY was interesting.
Trance and her mum and her friend Pearl picked me up, and we all went out and had lunch (our waiter was adorable). Then we bought our movie tickets, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire!, and walked around the hour we had until the movie started. Trance and I snooped around Victoria Secret for awhile, then went down to Suncoast where we were looking at Anime and such. I spotted a bag and said to really no one in particular, "Is that a Samurai Champloo bag?!" and a voice behind me said, "I wish it was." It was my old guy friend Navi, from school! My god I haven't seen him in years, and I do admit that having him hug me so close made old feelings arise. But, I was young and stupid when I first met him, and I missed my chance; he's got a girlfriend now, although he did seem really happy to see me...Anyway, we then went and saw the movie, and when it was over I finally decided to stop being such a doofus and ran back to Suncoast, and handed Navi my number. I wish to at least keep in touch!

current mood: devious

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Sunday, November 27th, 2005
2:05 pm - I found an angel, his name is Smurf.
Today I had a two hour long conversation with Tony, and it was the best one ever. My mood swung from one thing to another; one moment I was laughing hysterically with him, the next I had tears pouring down my face as I finally expressed to him what he really ment to me. He did a perfect impression of Michael's voice and told me about all the times he had gone out as Michael, with fake body guards, and made people freak out; then we talked about WWE and that someday we were going to hang out and watch it and talk about The Hurricane and Shawn Michaels. Then we had a lovely, long talk about Jesus Christ and The Holy Spirit and God working his love and light through all off us, as a way of spreading his name and pure tranquility and peace. I finally dubbed him as 'Smurf', since he calls me Sweetie and Kiddo, so we have a tie there. I was so thrilled to know that the numerous things we have in common made him happy, and that I am in his prayers. He has been added to my prayers, which I now say upon my knees everynight; I haven't prayed in a long time, but he has changed me. Michael changed the way that I live, Tony changed the way I think. God bless you, sweet spirit.

current mood: peaceful

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Monday, November 21st, 2005
6:05 pm - Last night I had a WEIRD dream...
I was sailing down a canal from one area of the Spanish Maine to the other, on a beautiful storybook ship. There was a crew of miscreants and the sound of a flute and a bird's song could be heard all through the passage. Suddenly, the ship was attacked by skeleton-style pirates. I fought them using sorcery, slinging spells left and right, despite the fact I was dressed like a frilly Lolita. I grabbed a rope of the mast and swung around starboard side, smashing one of my doll-like heels into a pirate, scattering his dusty bones. Finally, the ship floated near a small dock and I jumped off, racing into the crowed tavern. As I entered, the light hurt my eyes and I puts my hands up to shield it; when I lowered them, it was no tavern but a party, much like the Las Vegas one I performed, and I was surrounded by other Michael Jackson inpersonators and dedicate fans. I looked at myself and noticed I was somehow in full costume, so I took the stage and pleased the crowd into quite an uproar. Suddenly I looked towards the crowded doorway and I saw him: Tony J. Redburn was wading through the sea of people, trying to get towards the stage. I hopped off and ran to him, and his face lit up to see me there. "I haven't alot of time right now, but I am SO happy to see you! It's been ages..." he said, scooping me into a hug and kissing the back off my silky black hair. I broke away, putting it all on the money and placing a kiss on his cheek. He gave a cute, embarrased little yelp before his Dad walked up behind him, stating it was time to leave. He looked right at me, and walked into the fog and out of sight. I sighed and walked back to the stage, hopping up on it and continuing my routein, when I looked up; I saw him, standing on a chair waving his arms around. I marched off the stage and asked him what the hell he was doing back her, and he said, "I had to come back, I came all the way back here. It was supposed to me like this..." and he took ahold me and kissed me, the way I thought it would feel to kiss Tony J.Redburn; very soft, sweet and shy like a child. I could feel my tongue gently run across the small little adorable gap in his front teeth. And then...MY GRANDMA LET HERSELF INTO MY HOUSE AND RUINED THE WHOLE THING. -_____-

current mood: bouncy

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